Saturday, October 10, 2009

Love

I've been trying to figure out how to write this post for the past few days. I'll just go for it and hope it makes sense.

Lately I have been so overwhelmed by love: by God's unconditional love for me, the love my family has shown me in the past few weeks, and especially the love from friends. It hasn't really hit me that I left NYC for good until recently. I was so busy getting 4 years of stuff from one place to the next and arranging car/house/furniture, etc. that I didn't quite grasp what I was really doing. I woke up one morning last week and got an email from a friend in NYC telling me how much she missed me and in the end she said, "love you so much". I was overwhelmed. It was one of those moments where loved triumphed over my fears. I felt the comfort of knowing that my friendships in NYC will last and that I will make new friends here in Charlotte.

Today my heart has also been filled with love. My dear friends Maggie and Neal are got married and I wasn't able to make it. Oh how special weddings are to me and how incredible it is to witness two friends who will commit the rest of their lives together. M&N, I have thought about you all day today. I went to a USC game with Alan (thanks, Alan!) and he was a trooper for listening to me every 30 minutes say (or think), "I bet Maggie is in her dress", "She's probably walking down the aisle", or "They're married!!". Congrats to you both; I wish I could've been there to celebrate with you. I'm sure yall are dancing away right now!

When I moved from NC to Long Island almost 4 years ago, I got there and was handed two babies, an almost 60 hr/week job, new town, life and everything. I quickly asked myself, in tears, when the next flight was to NC. But after getting in my groove, I found it to be home. I feel the same way now... and while I know a few people in Charlotte, it feels somewhat overwhelming to start all over.

I guess to conclude, I am humbled by love. I am reminded, especially looking back over the rollercoaster year of 2009, that I'm not promised, as much as I wish I was, that life will be easy or consistent. Even in my deep anxiety over different things, God is faithful to provide His own love to quiet my fears and also the love of family and friends to listen and care. To be shown this love is incredible and makes you want to be a better friend.

And that's what I have to say about that.

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